The Name (Dumb...Huh?) - Tealy and the Crew

It had started three days after the breakfast incident.

DumbDird had been in the middle of a conversation with Tealy about episode five — the bigger catapult episode, the one that had been on the agenda since the first production meeting, the one DumbDird had been gesturing toward with increasing excitement for several weeks — when he had said:

"DURR, TALLY, FOR DURR...HUH? EPISODE FIVE—"

Tealy looked up from his phone.

"What did you call it."

"DURR, DURR...HUH?—"

"The show."

"DURR, YEAH—"

"What's it called."

DumbDird opened his mouth.

Closed it.

The expression on his face was the expression of someone reaching for something that was not where they expected it to be. A hand going to a pocket and finding it empty. A confident step onto a stair that wasn't there.

"Durr," said DumbDird.

"Dumb...Huh?," said Tealy.

"DURR, YEAH, DUMB...HUH?—"

"You said Durr...Huh?"

"DURR, SAME THING TALLY—"

"It's not the same thing, the show is called Dumb...Huh?—"

"DURR, YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I SAID—"

"You said Durr—"

"DURR, TALLY, IT'S MY SHOW, I KNOW WHAT IT'S CALLED—"

Tealy looked at him for a long moment.

Let it go.

This was a mistake.


Two days later, DumbDird was on the phone with someone from the Netflix production team, a call that Tealy was present for because DumbDird had called Tealy first and then conferenced in the Netflix person without warning, which was a thing that kept happening.

"DURR, YEAH, SO FOR DUMB...WHAT? EPISODE FIVE—"

Tealy looked up.

The Netflix person said: "Sorry, Dumb...What?"

"DURR, YEAH—"

"The show is called Dumb...Huh?," Tealy said loudly from across the room.

"DURR, THAT'S WHAT I SAID—"

"You said Dumb...What?—"

"DURR, SAME ENERGY TALLY—"

"IT'S NOT THE SAME—"

The Netflix person was quiet for a moment. Then: "Should we confirm the title?"

"DURR, YEAH, IT'S DUMB—" A pause. "DURR. DUMB DOT DOT DOT."

Another pause.

"Huh," Tealy said.

"DURR, YEAH, HUH, TALLY—"

"I was finishing it for you."

"DURR, I KNOW—"

"You paused."

"DURR, I WAS THINKING—"

"About your own show's name."

"DURR, TALLY—"

The Netflix person confirmed the title was Dumb...Huh? and moved on with the professionalism of someone who had decided not to investigate what was happening on the other end of this call.


Tealy posted in the group chat that evening.

"DumbDird forgot the name of his own show. He's called it Durr...Huh?, Dumb...What?, and Dumb... and then paused."

Dird reacted with 👍

Beric replied: "The show has been in production long enough that the name has lost meaning through repetition. Semantic satiation."

"He named it," Tealy replied.

"Yes."

"He named it and now he's forgotten it."

"Semantic satiation doesn't require long exposure. Sufficient repetition in a short period produces the same effect."

"He's said the name of his own show enough times that it stopped being a word."

"Essentially, yes."

Greeny replied: "This is consistent with how DumbDird processes language generally."

Blara sent a photo of a question mark.

Not a question mark on anything. Just a large printed question mark, on white paper, photographed on a flat surface. She had made it. Or printed it. Either way she had prepared it and it was ready and it was the correct response.

Dird reacted with 👍

DumbDird replied to the thread: "DURR TALLY IT'S CALLED DUMB...WAIT?"

The chat was quiet for a moment.

"Huh," Tealy typed.

"DURR, YEAH, HUH, THAT'S THE ONE—"

"I was expressing confusion."

"DURR OH"

"DumbDird."

"DURR YEAH TALLY"

"What's your show called."

A pause.

A long pause.

The kind of pause that had geography to it.

"DURR"

"That's your catchphrase."

"DURR YEAH"

"The show isn't called Durr."

"DURR, TALLY IT'S—" A pause. "DURR IT'S DUMB—"

"Yes."

"DURR DUMB DOT DOT DOT"

"Keep going."

"DURR"

"That's still your catchphrase."

"DURR, TALLY, I KNOW THE WORD, IT'S JUST—"

"What is it."

"DURR IT'S THE THING YOU SAY"

"What thing."

"DURR THE CONFUSED THING"

"DumbDird."

"DURR THE—" A longer pause. "DURR. HUH."

"Yes."

"DURR TALLY IT'S DUMB...HUH?"

"There it is."

"DURR I KNEW IT"

"You forgot it."

"DURR, DUH, TALLY, I JUST NEEDED A SECOND—"

"You called it Dumb...What? on a Netflix call."

"DURR SAME ENERGY TALLY"

Tealy stared at same energy for a long moment.

Beric replied: "They're not the same. 'What' implies confusion about content. 'Huh' implies confusion about existence. The show is philosophically 'Huh'."

The chat was quiet.

"Durr," DumbDird replied. "Yeah Beric. Exactly."

"That's not what I—" Beric started.

"DURR, THE SHOW IS PHILOSOPHICALLY HUH, BERIC, THAT'S REALLY GOOD—"

"I wasn't endorsing—"

"DURR TALLY DID YOU SEE WHAT BERIC SAID—"

Tealy had seen what Beric said.

He looked at it again.

The show is philosophically Huh.

He looked at the show's entire existence. The catapult. The balloon. The CleaningBot exploding into ten Swiffers. The three-year-old and the traffic cone and the angry old man. The drone with the thumbs up balloon. The paper towel roll. The VR headset playing Peppa Pig. The forty-two YouTube views. The Netflix application that listed the traffic cone as a fan.

Philosophically Huh.

"Yeah," Tealy typed, against his better judgment and every instinct he had. "That's actually right."

"DURRRRR—"

"Don't."

"TALLY—"

"I'm going to bed."

"DURR TALLY IT'S 4 PM—"

"I'm going to bed at 4 PM, DumbDird, it's been a week—"

"DURR FAIR"

"What's your show called."

"DURR...WAIT?"

"Wrong."

"DURR, I KNOW, I KNOW—DUMB...HUH?"

"Good."

"DURR TALLY"

"What."

"DURR WHAT IF WE CALLED IT DURR...HUH? INSTEAD"

Tealy closed the app.

Put his phone down.

Picked it up.

"It's been called Dumb...Huh? for four episodes, it's on Netflix, and you named it."

"DURR YEAH BUT DURR...HUH? IS ALSO GOOD TALLY"

"Goodnight DumbDird."

"DURR GOODNIGHT TALLY"

"DURR...HUH? THOUGH"

"GOODNIGHT."

"DURR, OKAY, OKAY—DUMB...HUH?"

"Thank you."

"DURR...WAIT?"

Tealy turned his phone off.

Lay in his bed at 4:17 PM.

Thought about nothing.

Did not scream.

The show was called Dumb...Huh?

It had always been called Dumb...Huh?

Somewhere, DumbDird was probably already testing Durr...Wait? on someone.

That was fine.

That was just how it was.

The show was philosophically Huh.

Tealy was philosophically done for the day.

He went to sleep at 4:18 PM and did not wake up until morning and did not scream once.

Progress.

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